A Little Intro
I am the creator of high on you and I am just like you. I am on a journey of finding myself, becoming better and basically becoming the woman of my dreams. I started high on you because I feel there is so much power and magic in women and majority of women live their lives not even recognizing that. My vision is to create a community of women that is so strong that it feels like a second home, a home full of love and magic where we all grow together.
A huge hub of women who are determined to live their dream life is what I imagine high on you to be. So, if you want to be a high on you bestie, sister or guide and transform together, you can connect through social media platforms. The links are given below.
So, now that you know me, let me enlighten you with my acquired knowledge on this topic.
Introduction
People pleasing is the habit of putting other's needs before your own. It is when you neglect yourself just to avoid conflict or disappointing someone. People pleasers often act out of fear, fear of rejection, judgement, or disappointing others. Don't confuse kindness with people pleasing. Kindness is a choice while people pleasing is a compulsion. It is a terrible habit to have, it can make you take decisions that you regret later, that takes away your confidence from you, and you my babe don't deserve that. Let's understand it properly.
Signs You Might be a People Pleaser
It is important to first understand your own patterns. Sometimes we do things that we don't even realize is causing harm to us. Make it a habit to try to know and analyze yourself every single day instead of analyzing others. Here are few of those signs:-
- You say yes when you want to say no
- You avoid conflict at all costs
- You feel guilty for putting yourself first
- Your self-worth depends on approval from others
Why People Pleasing is Harmful
It is sometimes difficult to understand that you're a people pleaser. Because you might think you're being kind or noble. But it is not true, this is how most of us women are conditioned to think or are expected to behave. Not to put yourself first and over time we often neglect ourselves and our self respect just so others can stay happy. This needs to change. Let me tell you why people pleasing is harmful.
You Lose Connection with Yourself
Constantly prioritizing others' needs makes you forget what you want, feel, or value. You begin living through others' expectations instead of your own truth.
It Creates Burnout
You give, give, give—without receiving or resting. Always saying yes, overcommitting, and carrying emotional loads for others leaves you exhausted, overwhelmed, and disconnected.
It Damages Your Confidence
You begin to doubt your worth unless others validate you. Your sense of identity becomes tied to external approval, making you feel anxious or insecure when it's not given.
It Attracts One Sided Relationships
When people know you’ll always say yes, they stop asking how you feel. This attracts users, energy-drainers, and emotionally unavailable people.
You're Not Being Truly Kind
Real kindness is honest, balanced, and mutual. People pleasing comes from fear, not love. It keeps you small and silent, even when your truth matters.
The Power of Healthy Kindness
While you choose to show kindness to others it is important you show kindness to yourself too. Healthy kindness will lift you up as well. Set the right boundaries and don't feel guilty for it because you are allowed to look after yourself too. If anything makes you feel bad at the end of the day, create a boundary to protect yourself. You can still be kind to others while protecting your own peace.
How to Stop People Pleasing
If you feel saying no makes you rude, try doing it with grace. Because you can't just say yes because you don't want to sound rude. Take a pause before agreeing to anything, this will help you think too and will also stop you from immediately saying yes to something out of the people pleasing habit. Ask yourself : Am I doing this out of guilt or love? This will help you understand better.
Shifting Your Mindset
You are not responsible for everyone's feelings. You don't have the responsibility of making everyone happy around you by sacrificing yourself. To love someone doesn't mean you have to be available 24/7. Remember that your first responsibility is you, keep yourself happy and stay kind to yourself. You can truly be kind to others when you are truly kind to yourself.
Lastly I would say stay kind, but not at the cost of your own peace.
If you want to personally reach out to me and know more about getting better and becoming a high value woman, you can mail me at:
You can also visit the
High on You Co. online store for some Divine Feminine Tees, journals and more.
Lots of Love.
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